Month: March 2018

The Story of the Butterfly

The Story of the Butterfly

The Story of the Butterfly

When I was a little girl we would go to the lake all the time to spend the day. I thought the water was amazing, but I really loved the sand. I would ALWAYS find a caterpillar and put it in a old Pringles container with twigs and leaves. This would be my pet until my parents would make me turn him loose, back into the world.

Some think caterpillars are ugly, however I have always been fascinated with them. I thought they were so cute, and I wanted to show them love when the rest of the world thought they were so undeserving. I knew they turned into beautiful butterflies and the world be sorry that they had such terrible feelings about the caterpillar.

I grew up a caterpillar. I was the girl that was made fun of in school. I never had the cool clothes. I was always the nerd. I was the little girl wearing pretty lace dresses when all the other girls wore jeans. I was the awkward teenager with awkward eyebrows because I didn’t know about makeup and beauty tricks. I was the young adult that everyone overlooked because there was always someone prettier.

I was the one that everyone else laughed at. I usually had no idea WHY everyone was laughing, but knew the laughter was directed at me.

Fast forward through some adult years and four children. I was an overweight and tired mommy. I hated my life because I felt like nothing. I believed I WAS nothing. I wasn’t beautiful or trendy. I was in a terrible marriage. I felt that if I were to disappear- no one would ever notice.

I started exercising because I heard that gives you energy and makes you feel good. I noticed I started to lose some weight and that brought me to wanting to make better eating choices. During that year I lost weight. It is a very addicting feeling watching the pounds melt away, with clothes that were snug- now too large.

Maybe it was because I felt I had no control over my life. Maybe it was an addiction to the weight loss. Maybe I thought I could actually disappear into nothingness if I lost enough weight. Maybe I thought I would finally be beautiful if I weighed a certain amount. Maybe I thought I would finally be worthy of love and affection if I wore a smaller size. Maybe I would finally be a loved and cherished caterpillar.

I could see my ribs and every other bone in my skeleton. My hip bones protruded out so far that sometimes it was painful to wear jeans. I had to start wearing little girl clothes because women’s and teenage clothing were too large.

I had discovered strength in my workouts. I had found running and would go for a run every morning. I was running between 10-12 miles daily. Then I would go home and workout again at home. Then I would sit the rest of the day, because I didn’t have the energy to do anything else. I wanted to see the scale keep dropping, because THEN I would be that cherished caterpillar.

One morning after a run and my shower, I had no energy to even stand. I had to lay down on the bed without my clothes because I couldn’t even dress myself. I thought I would pass out every time I stood up. I honestly can’t describe in detail how I felt, except, I thought I was going to die. I truly believed that it must be my time today. Honestly? I was ok with that. Then I thought of my children. How devastated they would be to find me. Dead. A skeleton.

It would be traumatizing enough to lose their mommy. Eventually though, they would find out that Mommy did it to herself. Why didn’t Mommy just eat?

I realized then that I needed to take the strength that I had discovered in my workouts and apply it to my life. I told myself that I could treat myself with care instead of hatred. I could eat.

I started to eat for health. If it was good for me, I was allowed to eat it. Without counting calories. I did workouts for strength- not weight loss. I allowed myself to be healthy.

It’s been a few years since that day that I realized that I am worth more than nothing.  I took my fascination for exercise and food and became certified to help others on their weight loss journey so they don’t make the same mistakes I made. I competed in a fitness bikini competition and am working on another. I left a terrible marriage and I am now married to the most amazing man in the universe.

Some things I learned on the caterpillar journey:
-I don’t need others to like me. I need to like myself.
-The universe put me here for a reason. Therefore, I am ENOUGH.
-Happiness is NEVER found at the small end of the scale.
-I need to be my own kind of beautiful.

 

I believe I finally earned my butterfly wings. Butterflies are really special to me, which is why I have a butterfly tattoo on my wrist for me to see daily. This is also what gave my husband the inspiration to design my logo that portrays who I am that is now included in everything I do. My permanent reminders that I am a cherished butterfly. No longer a caterpillar.

 

2 Ingredient Pancakes

2 Ingredient Pancakes

I have been making this recipe for years now. I remember the first time I tried them- I was wondering if this could possibly turn out well? I ate them for breakfast after a pilates workout and remember feeling so good about myself because I had spent the morning doing things that were good for me. I want to pass that feeling on with this recipe! I love them with blueberries 🙂

 

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2 Ingredient Pancakes

This recipe starts with a two ingredient base, but the possibilities for add on's are endless! This recipe serves one, so multiply it if you want to share or even make more for the rest of the week to eat up later. Meal prep anyone?

Ingredients

  • 1 banana mashed
  • 2 eggs whole

Instructions

  1. Mash banana and eggs. Either with a fork in a bowl or in a mini blender. Pour into a sprayed skillet and cook until edges are set, then flip. Can make one large pancake or several small ones. 

Recipe Notes

Possible add on's

*protein powder
*blueberries
*any other fruit
*vanilla
*maple flavor
*nuts

Overnight Oats

Overnight Oats

I absolutely love overnight oats. I have been making them for years. The options to make them different each time are positively endless. The fact that I can make them assembly line style for the entire week is fabulous. And they are in general…..just amazing. Here is my basic recipe and then I will share just some of the ways that you can modify them. 🙂

Overnight Oats

Ingredients

  • 1/2 cup oats uncooked
  • 1/2 cup nonfat greek yogurt
  • 1/2 cup almond coconut, or soy milk
  • 1 tbsp chia seeds
  • 1 tbsp flax seeds
  • 1 tbsp hemp seeds

Instructions

  1. This is for one serving. Mix all in bowl and refrigerate overnight. Multiply for as many days as you want to make it for!

Recipe Notes

Variations- can add as many as you like of the following. Just remember that the more ingredients you add, they add on in calories. 😉 *dried fruit *cinnamon *vanilla *scoop of protein powder *scoop of shakeoloy *chopped fresh fruit

 

 

21 Day Fix Challenge Group

Calling all peeps who want to get fit! I want to cordially invite you to my “Fit Mom Adventures” 21 Day Fix Challenge Group!

We will start next week and there will be recipes, support and motivation all over the place!! 😀

Are you prepared to take the first step and get started on your healthier journey for this summer? For your vacations? To look and feel amazing? ❤️

Leave me a message and tell me you want in!